Fitness & Me

Post From Feb 10, 2019*

This was one of the hardest posts I have ever written! - -

I got into the fitness world six years ago. I was overweight, depressed, in an extremely toxic relationship (we were just no good for each other and equally to blame), and going downhill rapidly. I got into fitness and changed it EVERYTHING about my life. I got out of that relationship a few months after getting into fitness, become healthy was not only a physical thing for me. Fitness saved my life because getting into fitness helped me become healthy mind body and soul. - -

Fast forward two years and I got my personal training certification, start my own small studio training, meet my soulmate (my husband), and I am in such an amazing place mentally physically emotionally. - -

Summer 2017 I become pregnant with my son. My first born. Everyone said, “you’ll stay tiny, you’ll bounce back, your body is perfect.” We had complications in the beginning and Had a scare where they thought we might lose him. I was told not to exercise until the 2nd trimester. I tried to keep my diet good but curse those darn pregnancy cravings! I exercised from week 14 to week 30 when they told me “slow down you are doing too much he may come early. It’s too early only walking for the rest of your pregnancy” I felt disgusting, huge, and ugly. A time where a woman is supposed to be able to appreciate and love her body the most all I could focus on was “how all my hard work over the years was out the window.”

Forty-two weeks pregnant my son still isn’t here, we go in for induction and end up having an emergency C-section. I am broken, I’m angry, and I’m discouraged. I try to be grateful, but I’m so upset. Then I look at my son, and he’s just so stinking cute. I love him like have never loved another. I love him with every fiber of my being. I’m the beginning the nights are long, sleep is non existent, and hormones run wild. No driving or lifting anything over 10 lbs for 2 weeks. Week 4 light cardio allowed. 6 weeks postpartum still no heavy lifting and only light cardio. Weeks 8 and 10 still the same. I am not cleared to exercise until 12 weeks postpartum. Getting out of my own head has been the hardest thing I ever had to do.

Finally, I start getting back into it. I’m working out daily but can’t stick to a consistent routine. I am constantly changing my workouts, feel they aren’t working, because my body has literally changed overnight. I am tracking my progress and workout routines on my page because I need something to hold me accountable. Sometimes as trainers we need that too! I want to be the best version of myself for my son, mind body and soul. I want to be someone he looks up to, someone he aspires to be. I want to lead by example. This is our year and a fresh start for me.

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PEACE LOVE & HAPPINESS. LOVE THE SKIN YOU'RE IN. #BBTE